blogtober 10 what causes tension at holiday events


These topics always cause weird tension at family gatherings. Since the holidays are coming,  I’m going to think about why it’s such a problem. Mainly a generational difference, but still. You’d think it would be past time to make a choice about these topics and move on

Pigs Feet- There are always 3 relatives who demand these and are surprised when no one else wants them. It’s a whole bunch of feet in a pot just swimming around for however long. My parents never allowed me to try it because apparently, it is all fat. Now that I’m grown, I don’t try them because I don’t want to hear comments from a particular parent, also boiled fat doesn’t sound appealing. If they were deep-fried and could become like a type of bacon? I would consider it more. The typical argument is about respecting our past. I personally, I feel it can be done without eating the foods.

Chitlins- These don’t taste as bad as they smell but the odor is the biggest topic of contention. It is really hard to get the smell out of the house. I’m not sure why they can’t get prepped the day before and brought over in a crockpot. I don’t mind them if they have a nice spice level, I don’t have a preference about peppers being involved. I also don’t believe it takes away the smell or the different tastes. The broth is super strong and smelly. This also takes up valuable counter space which the younger generation gets annoyed about. The best option would be to make a smaller amount or the people who want them, everyone pitch in and have someone make it and portion it out for another time.

Fried VS Regular Turkey
 This issue stems from how much meat we should have at these events. There are usually two or 3 other options so adding two turkeys to the mix gets overwhelming. When people don’t follow the list for who is bringing what always causes drama. Which turkey should be had first? It’s always the fried turkey, ham and one other option. Then the older relatives bring up that respecting your past argument and the side eyes are strong enough to hear. I go for the fried turkey because I’m not making that at home. I find a regular turkey to be boring and there are more interesting options usually. I wish older relatives wouldn’t take it so seriously. Just make it for your home.

Lima Beans- This is the newest food that has been gossiped about. It has been at the table for years but the aunts and uncles have been fighting about if they should be there because only two people eat it. There are concerns that my grandmother shouldn’t be making food that at least half of the family will eat because it’s putting a “strain” on her. My thoughts are if she wants to make something only a few people eat, that’s her business. I don’t eat them based on allergies so I get to be excused from that conversation. This is another portion issue, just make less

Leftovers- This is by the far the biggest issue every holiday. A few reasons why this seemingly good thing causes at least one argument. People need to mind their business! After everyone makes one-two plates and there are still items left? First come first serve. If people would stop bringing random items that weren’t discussed that would help things. We make lists for a reason. Older relatives also need to not take it personally if not all of their food was taken. Then again, if others wouldn’t verbally speak on what others were taking, maybe others (the younger group) would feel comfortable taking more. Better take out container options would be good. You only want to take so many wrapped plates. Don’t bring a house load of items that everyone doesn’t eat and get mad when your stuff is left out.

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